I'd like to commemorate tomorrow's season opener of the Phoenix Suns with a few of my favorite Phoenix Suns moments, players and general happenings through the past few years.
Steve Nash joins the Phoenix Suns in 2004, signaling the dawn of an era. The beginning of discussions about his ungodly number of assists per game, contemplating his post-game ice bath routine and wondering if he'll ever cut his hair. We cheer his left-handed layups, curse his terrible defense and gag when we think about him licking his fingers constantly after manhandling the basketball or running them through his greasy, greasy hair. We bow down to thee.
Can we mention the run-and-gun Phoenix Suns without discussing Robert Sarver? The less cool version of Mark Cuban who made his millions by running independent banks in Arizona and San Diego. I cringe everytime I think about his gaudy "spirited" game-day attire with foam glove in hand and lack of any basketball knowledge or experience. I miss Bryan Colangelo oh so much...
The '05-'06 Phoenix Suns team, who basically dominated my entire life that year. Lineup - Steve Nash - being MVP, Shawn Marion - playing every position possible, Raja Bell - clotheslining Kobe Bryant, Boris Diaw - as center, something I'm still trying to figure out, Leandro Barbosa - maybe briefly saw him as a blur a few times, Eddie House - who took oh, 30 shots a game, Tim Thomas - not really a great player but somehow saved our ass a bunch of times, plus some obscure players that only saw the end of the bench such as Nikoloz Tskitisvilli who I doubt anybody but me remembers and I only do because it took me weeks to learn how to properly say his name. Those were the days. Before Amare did his annoyingly selfish take over the court routine or we picked up the slowest, oldest player known to man (Shaquille O'Neal).
I can't mention the '05 - '06 Phoenix Suns without talking about the best and probably only sports book I will ever read in my life :7 seconds or less by Jack McCallum who followed the Suns around for that entire season and wrote a book about it. It is hilarious. The dry, witty humor and the perfect characterizations of everything from the coaches to the Suns pizza guy (Bianco - the best pizza in the country guy) is so good. I've read it 4 times and every time, I am still laughing and get caught up, hoping that the team will pull through and win in the end, which obviously, they don't...
And finally, it's more of a Suns inside joke, but I can't talk about the run-and-gun era Suns without talking Pat Burke. He is the only Irish-born player that has played in the NBA. His main role with the Suns was to cheer on the team, provide comic relief (please see his Pat Burke For Congress Video - he's just not that busy right now) and be the token bald guy. We yelled the loudest when he came on the last 2 minutes of the game, when the Suns were up by 25 points and he came on, scored a few three pointers and made some wimpy dunks. Long live Pat Burke, you'll always have a fond place in my heart.
